Charlie Bluster becomes Prime Minister

A side-splitting, toilet flushing, kung-fu ballet dancing, political epic adventure story.

For Adults and Children of 10 years +

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Parliament held an emergency session to discuss the crisis. “Now I hope we are all agreed,” said the current Prime Minister, “that fourteen-year-old boys are absolutely not allowed to run for office. We’ll make an official statement to say that this Charlie Bluster is not eligible.” “But he’s just the cutest little boy,” declared Miss Jack, Minister for the Interior. She pointed at the PM, “and he would look so much better than you do on TV.” A roar of agreement erupted from both the back and forward benches at the same time. "Oooh and I accidentally ran into him last week,” said Mr Jones, Minister for the Exterior. “He is the nicest boy you could ever hope to meet. What’s more, he promised that I would be promoted to Chancellor of the Exchequer when he becomes Prime Minister. Such a wonderful, wonderful child.” The current Chancellor of the Exchequer looked extremely displeased. He immediately raised a motion to have the Minister for the Exterior covered in Cold Custard however it was quickly voted down as nobody really liked the Chancellor.

Welcome to The Tragedy of Charlie Bluster and Charlie Bluster becomes Prime Minister!

The third incredible book in the Charlie Bluster series continues the story after the end of the second book, ‘Fate’s Apprentice’.

Trained in the magical powers of the gods and the unholy skills of Marketing, Charlie bunks Olympus and returns home to Britain. Everyone wants to find out more about him and backed up by his special abilities it’s not long before he is more popular than Taylor Swift and The Rock combined.

Riding high on the wave of his own success, Charlie decides to run for the position of Prime Minister. What lies will he tell to convince people to vote for him and would he do a better job than the Tories?

It’s not all plain sailing as Malcolm, god of Fate, after another almighty temper tantrum, wants rid of poor Charlie. He teams up with bad guy, and all-round nasty piece of work, Conn McLear, to get rid of our hero once and for all.

Read on to find more snippets from the story, a detailed description of the Prime Minister’s private loo, (it’s the most advanced toilet in the world and so awesome Iron Man would give his spare helmet just to use it once), and details of some of the foul traps laid by Malcolm and McLear to trap Charlie.

You'll find lots more in the book itself including Policies of Success, the essential formula for winning an election and becoming prime minister and not to forget, the largest bogey ball ever assembled.

Toilet Technology

The British Prime Minister has the most advanced toilet in the known world, get the low-down on it here!

Tip Top Toilet Technologies and Features

  • The first thing he did was to install a widescreen TV just above the door.
  • This was closely followed by the latest video games console, with special compartments built into the side of the toilet bowl to contain the controllers.
  • The toilet roll holder was made out of solid gold and dispensed the softest and velvetiest toilet paper known to man. The stuff was actually imported from Kashmir and manufactured by the same people that made the rugs.
  • They also made the toilet seat out of the same material to protect against Prime Ministerial Toilet Ring, (if the PM spent too long playing games while on the loo).
  • The toilet itself was an original Crapper and was a work of genius!
  • There was no loo brush, instead, a set of windscreen wipers had been installed inside the bowl that automatically cleaned the toilet on each flush.
  • And, should there be any gas escape from the Prime Ministerial Behind then lavender-scented oxygen, bottled at the very summit of Mount Everest, would automatically be pumped in.

The evil Conn McLear and his ally, Malcolm, god of Fate, have it in for Charlie Bluster and have laid several dastardly devious traps of doom hoping to catch Charlie unawares.

Trap 1 - Accidental Petrol Spillage of Death

Having guzzled too much water and continually delayed by Conn, Charlie will be crossing his legs and sprinting for the toilet. Children, how many times does Mummy tell you not to run in the bathroom in case you slip?

“Oooh,” stated Malcolm, “what sort of accident are you talking about? Like maybe he might break a fingernail?”

“Or maybe,” said McLear, thoughtfully chewing on a piece of the eighty-seven, “he might accidentally, violently slip and break his neck while going to the toilet.

Those stone floors can be very dangerous, especially if the right amount of Petrol has been poured onto them first.”


As soon as Jaden’s foot touched the first tile on the bathroom floor, he, unfortunately, (and of course Completely Accidentally), slipped badly on the petrol that someone had Accidentally, (and on purpose), spilt.

The perpetrator, however, hadn’t counted on the Enormous Expanse of Jaden’s Bottom which was reinforced through years of being on a Massive See-Food Diet, (this is different to a Sea-food diet. With a See-food diet, you eat all the food you can see).

Trap 2 – Callous Car Insurance Assassin of Doom

McLear has used his influence to cause some poor person’s car insurance premium to go up astronomically. He’s promised to make it all go away if only the man will get rid of Charlie first. McLear will distract Charlie at the crucial moment so his defences will be down.

“Oh-oh,” said Malcolm putting his hand up again, “he could accidentally Smudge his Mascara, that would be a real disaster.”

“Or perhaps,” said McLear, “while he was distracted fixing it, he might be brutally murdered by an assassin who was in a particularly foul mood due to his Car Insurance Premium having vastly increased.”


It was at this very moment that a Rogue Assassin appeared on the scene! Enraged to the point of madness, (due to the large increase in his car insurance premium), he had been promised a discount if only he could get rid of Charlie Bluster.

Brandishing his Renewal Form he leapt towards Charlie in a rage hoping to finish the boy off in a single stroke. Needing the loo badly, Charlie struggled to settle himself into Tortoise Kung-fu or indeed adopt any defensive stance at all.

Trap 3 – Killer Crocodile of Certain Damnation

Charlie and Katie have worked hard all day giving speeches, meeting fans and looking cool. There’s nothing they want more than a nice sit-down for five minutes before the next meeting. Unfortunately for them, the sofa has been booby-trapped in the third of McLear’s dastardly traps:

“Or worst of all,” said Malcolm he might lose his keys down the side of the settee and be forced to put his hand in there with all the crumbs, bogeys and disgusting mouldy old cornflakes.”

Malcolm shivered at the very thought and the horror of the situation.

“Indeed,” said McLear, “and while he was doing that his whole arm might get bitten off by a Rabid Crocodile that just happened to have got lost down the side of the sofa earlier that day.”

Sitting down, Hercules was violently and brutally attacked by the rabid crocodile which attempted to bite his Entire Bum off in one go!

Hercules wasn’t god of exercise for nothing! Executing an immediate Star Jump he launched himself up off the sofa and away from danger.

Otherworld: Epic Adventure